In today's "Fruity, Or Just Icelandic?"

…We present reigning champions Sigur Rós, and their new single, Gobbledigook! I know it's sometimes hard to tell the difference between the two, but I've weighed up both possibilities very carefully, and here's my thinking:

Fruity:

• The word Gobbledigook. Picture it: Chaz and Dale are down at Rough Riders, enjoying a couple of cosmos, and Dale is talking about Hilary Clinton's chances of being president. Chaz: "Oh, shut up, Dale! You're talking gobbledigook!" It's a fruity word, is what I'm trying to say.
• Falsetto singing. Fruity.
• The video's got cocks in. Flaccid cocks. Flaccid cocks are fruity. Hard cocks are sometimes fruity, but flaccid cocks: always fruity.
• The video's got loads of trees in. Iceland has next to no trees. Therefore this song is not Icelandic. Therefore it's fruity.
  

Icelandic:

• Well... They're Icelandic.
• The video features lots of young beautiful naked people swimming. Icelandic people mostly enjoy three things: 1) swimming; 2) being beautiful; and 3) being naked. This is strong evidence that this song is Icelandic.
• They're singing in Icelandic.
• I think?

All of which rampant homophobia leads us to the one possible conclusion: this song is both fruity and Icelandic! Fruitlandic! Icefruity! Hooray!

Album's coming out at the end of the month. It's got a stupid name. I think I'm going to bed.